when depression ends

My own battle with depression began in high school and really escalated when I went to college. My entire first year of college was nearly consumed by depression. I had crippling self-doubt, negative thoughts and chaotic relationships. Finding a therapist really helped on that journey but still I did not feel any real improvement until one day I noticed a cherry tree in bloom. It was in that moment that I realized that I had not even looked up in almost a year. I walked through every day just staring at my feet, but in that moment I saw some beautiful, something outside of myself and I realized that I had hope for a life free from depression. Now I have that life but it doesn't mean that I am happy all of the time and I do have real struggles. What I learned about depression is that it makes everything hard: going to work, relationships, hobbies and sometimes just existing is hard. One of the symptoms of depression is that you no longer enjoy the things that you used to. Sometimes, one of the best skills you can use when you are depressed is pushing yourself to do the things that you used to enjoy and maybe one day you will find yourself looking up and noticing a real change.

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